Wishing and Hoping and Dreaming. . .

So says the catchy, can’t get it out of your mind song that opens My Best Friend’s Wedding.

Wishing. .  .oh boy, if I could even get a forth of my wishes to come true, I would be a happy camper. Living in the past is not healthy but moving forward is proving to be more difficult that I realized. If I could take one day back and change the choices that I made, I would, in a heartbeat. I have found that had I had a conversation that could have broken us anyway, I might be better off. If only I had pushed the subjects I wanted to know about I might have seen things differently but I didn’t and I blame myself for not pushing it.

I also wish that I had become financially responsible a lot sooner than I did. We all want the vacations, the clothes and the fun stuff but at some point the party stops and you have to pay the piper. Luckily, I am almost done paying the piper but still, those lessons should have been learned in college.

Hoping. . .well, that one is easy (well besides having a huge pile of cash appear on my doorstep) that the boy would listen and give me another chance. Also, just to be vain, to lose the weight quickly, especially now that I will be having surgery. Don’t want the weight loss plan to get slowed down and surgery will probably do that to me.

Dreaming. . .a nice vacation to NYC and DC without having to worry about money. Also, a trip to Oxford to all the places I have heard about but that one might not happen anytime soon.

Anyway, those are all nice and when you have time on your hands, those thoughts start to swim around in your head until, well at least for me, they can drive me crazy. Do I want to move on? No but I will sit with my thoughts and maybe, just maybe one of my wishes, hopes or dreams will come true.


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