Rainbows

I have a thing for Wizard of Oz, the song Somewhere Over the Rainbow, is just beautiful. Then Liam was born and I kept seeing rainbows. I took that as a sign that my friend’s precious little boy was going to be okay. I haven’t blogged about those days after his passing because I have never really found the right words that would honor his passing. I couldn’t put what my heart felt as it broke watching my friends do the unthinkable.

As I left the hospital that day I knew that life had changed. I held him, kissed him, cried for him, his parents and everyone that had been praying for him. Stacey’s inlaws left shortly after I did to give them some time to say their private goodbyes. I headed home to grab a few things and then made my way back to their home. Where I told their furbabies that their little brother was gone.

We handled details after they got home, I made some calls and we met up with some friends for a bit just to delay going back to their home. The next day I picked up Stacey’s parents from the airport, dropped them off and headed home to rest before going back over to cook and spend time with family. I also met up with their photographer Gina, who volunteers for Now I Lay Me Down to Sleep to pick up the disc of final pictures and the DVD she created that would be shown at Liam’s service.

I couldn’t watch it but Stacey did shortly before we headed to the funeral home. She told me that the last song playing on the CD in the hospital was Somewhere Over the Rainbow (the guitar version) and that Gina put it on the DVD. The thing is, me with the rainbows, the song and Liam, none of this was discussed with the nurses or Gina. I guess God just wanted to keep on trying to tell us that even in the darkest of times, He is still there.

I only saw a portion during the service and saw the tail end of it at their home that night. I have yet to see it in it’s entirety.

But as I was going to bed the other night I had been drawn into the whole Jason and Molly get married! show. This time as the bride was walking down the isle, Jason Castro was singing the song. And I cried. I haven’t heard that song since Liam left us and all of the sudden, just a few cords in I am crying.

I can’t imagine what they deal with on a daily basis but I know that it has to difficult. This child was only with us for 20 days and I am not a blood member of this family, yet Liam is in my heart, forever. And with each rainbow I see or each time I hear that song, I will remember those times with him and miss what could have been had he proven us all wrong and was still here.

Liam, I love you and I thank you for making me remember to tell those I love that I love them and make the most out of each day. You taught me a lot in your short time here. I am forever grateful.