The Beach and Saying Goodbye

Traveling with my mom wasn’t all that bad, but I will have to say, if there is one thing she can do, it is pee. All the time! We took many potty breaks in the airport but finally got to our destination.

I did learn something about myself, I am no longer the person who lives to go to the beach. This can all be based on the fact that out of all my traveling since college, it has either been for business or it has been my trips to DC or NYC. I am not the biggest fan of the heat nor am I a fan of sand in the crouch.

Our days spent there went like this, I slept in while mom took a long walk on the beach, we reserve a cabana, go for breakfast, hit the beach, where I rotate between reading, napping and swimming, mom goes in to get cleaned up, I finally get myself together, rinse off the sticky salt water and head in for a shower. Then I lay on the bad, deciding if I want another nap. I get dressed and ready, we head out to eat, then drive for a bit, get ice cream and come back to the hotel. Mom takes off to walk the beach again and I fall asleep watching tv. I did this routine for three solid days.

I ate plenty of shrimp and crab cakes, as well as a ton of ice cream. I got a bit burnt on the last day there but other than that, it was a relaxing time. Of course, I had to have toothpicks to keep my eyes open on Monday since we got in at 8:30 and I still had to go to work for the day.

I had a post written about my Granny last week but didn’t publish it. In a nutshell, Granny, who is 95, is in congestive heart failure. Her quality of life is no longer what she nor any of us would label as great. My prayer for the past week has been for her to be comfortable and to pass as peacefully as possible.

I felt like this when I lost my beloved Popa. The one who I strive to be like because he was a really neat man. I didn’t not want him in my life but the reality was at 97 six years ago, his life was no longer about quality but quantity. He left this earth the Sunday before Thanksgiving. I say he timed it quite well because he passed shortly before Thanksgiving and got to have, in my opinion, one of the best feasts with all of his brothers, sisters and parents up in heaven. The man had good timing!

Granny’s life has never been easy. She learned around the time mom was born that she had been adopted. Her bio brother showed up one day and introduced himself. According to Popa, she was never the same. She and mom are a lot alike. You know they love you but neither are the overly lovey dovey type. Some people are just like that and really, it is no big deal. Mom works on this daily, I see it. Granny, well, I tell her I love her and she always responds in kind. But I don’t think she has ever just out and out said it first.

She was in ICU last week and then released. She was able to make it at home for about three days and she was back in ICU yesterday. I am pleased that they released her today and that hospice is now taking care of her at her own home.

She could last for weeks or it could be days. I ask for those who read this to lift her up in prayer and ask for a peaceful passing. I don’t want her to suffer. Her body is tired and I know she is over being poked and prodded.

I have made my peace with her leaving this world. I love her dearly but I think that being up in heaven with Popa and her family will make her much happier than she is here. Her lungs will be whole again and she will no longer feel pain.

Some people may view my words as being cold but I feel like sending her off in comfort and peace is what she wants. I will miss her but I will see her again. And just like Popa and Liam, I can always talk to her.


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