This time last year I was wrapping up spending the evening with my BFF and her husband. After an emotional year that was 2009, we were all ready to kiss it goodbye and hoped that 2010 would be better.
While I spent the majority of the year in a funk there were certainly moments of great happiness sprinkled in for good measure. Sometimes we have to do things we don’t want to do. . .I dug my heels in when it came to moving. I cried, I begged and I pleaded. When that didn’t work I resolved to suck it up for the year and starting making plans for my move back home once my commitment was over.
As I started to discuss the move back with my former boss an unexpected surprise happened. Chandler reentered my life, I wavered on my decision and by Thanksgiving I was swinging over to staying put. My friends were shocked, I was shocked. While this may never seem like home like Nashville will always be; I have a pretty good reason to stay. And we rang in the new year together.
After spending the past few years with my BFF, getting my NYE kiss from my stinky boyfriend (aka Shadow); this evening was different. I spoke to her this evening and listened to Mr. Eli cry in the background. I could her the joy and love in her voice as we spoke. And that part of me that still wants Nashville to be my return address tugged at me. But I also had to just look across the couch and see him, sitting there, waiting for me to hang up the phone (and stop talking about breastfeeding and circumcising) so we could watch the ball drop together. And then I remembered why I wanted to stay here.
I moved, wrecked my car, dealt with the boy coming in and out of my life, basically asking for me to psychoanalyze him and stroke his ego, struggled at work, dealt with saying goodbye to my last grandparent, physical ailments that reminded me that I am getting older, a couple of first dates that were just okay and then was blindsided by someone that I never in a million years thought would turn out to be the one and finally, welcoming the newest addition to my BFF’s family.
But even with all the crap I dealt with, the disappointments, etc. the year turned out to be pretty good. I got another person I can call my best friend. And some of those dreams that I thought were kind of out there for me just might be coming true. And I am also challenging myself for this new year. I want to write more, dig deeper and expose myself, even the not so pretty side and learn from all of it.
Last year as Stace and I sat talking, tears both coming down our faces, she still had faith that Liam was going to have a talk with the big guy upstairs and that the move had a bigger purpose. She was right. And Liam, you did a bang up job! I am so grateful for my friends, those that have become family when I was a few hours away from my own family. They took me in, cared for me, laughed with me and at me.
This year Chandler and I greeted the new year with a kiss and a hug. And then he tried to tickle me again.
I hope that each one of you has a wonderful year, full of joy, excitement and surprises. And to my friends and family, thank you all for dealing with me this year and loving me. Happy New Year!