A guy from my office, whom I shall call Peter (I kept trying to come up with a cool name but I will let this suffice) divorced last summer. Marrying young didn’t suit him or his former bride, so with that young marriage and resulting divorce, Peter has been playing the field.
Using my skills of being a funny friend who happens to be a girl has given me a chance to once again look at the guy’s perspective. And I find it funnier with each passing day. Peter is a player, at least that is his MO since coming back into the dating field. He bounces off thoughts of his latest conquests to me while talking about what he wants in a relationship.
And I thought I was picky!
But I have been trying to steer him in the right direction in terms of multi-dating. While I have no problem with someone wanting to play the field, see what is out there and then make a decision, this boy has gotten a few looks and stern words from me. So I thought I would pass this on to those who find themselves in Peter’s shoes, if you are so moved, you may direct payment in the form of giftcards to Sonic (I have to support my addiction you know).
- Be thoughtful of those on the merry-go-round with you–namely, always keep them informed of your desires to not commit, to anyone
- Should one of those involved in your quest to find the one simply turn out to me the one you are just not that into, tell that person ASAP
- Should the poor soul who just found out he/she isn’t really a viable candidate, cease and desist contact–Peter thinks he is being nice when responding to texts and calls, asking for time to be spent with him. This is not nice, it is leading that other person to think that there might just be a chance, someway, somehow that things will end perfectly
- Be safe, respect those that you are on the merry-go-round with
- Do not keep someone around for the sake of having someone to be with or so you can keep the Sugar Mama or Daddy in order to fund your outings
I probably have more but those are just a few that I have gone over with him and thought about as well. I am the first person to say that it sucks on holidays and special events when you are a single, not a couple but life goes on and settling isn’t worth it. Plus, looking at yourself in the mirror is a whole lot easier.
I have had men in my life express their feelings to me, saying I was the one only to see it crumble and yes, sometimes when the person you care about or even love says that they just are sure, it hurts. In the long run, it makes me appreciate their honesty. And I hope when I have been on the giving of this not so nice news that the guy will not think horribly of me and one day, maybe even appreciate my honesty.
Now if you will excuse me, I must get back to daydreaming that Prince Harry is coming here to proclaim his love to me. . .