Sometimes a post can just write itself, which in my book, is a good day. From the ever esteemed newspaper across the pond, The Daily Mail, a poor, put upon beauty named Samantha Brick wrote a piece the other day about how hard it is to be oh so beautiful. Apparently she is gifted all kinds of things from men whom she doesn’t know and women are completely jealous of her.
Oy Vey! Seriously? This has to be a horribly timed April Fools post because I don’t think I have ever read such drivel in my life. Well, maybe if I looked at a teen girl’s journal, I might see something just as bad. . . but probably not. The cherry on top was her rebuttle article after she recieved many not so nice comments on the article as well as Facebook. Brick even tried to explain that Londoners just don’t get it but having lived in Hollywood for a time, they do.
Now let me back up, I have never thought of myself as beautiful. Cute, sure. Dorky, oh hell yeah. And there are the times when I put forth a huge effort and have been complimented. Which I appreciate and the blush like there is no tomorrow. I am who I am and worrying about it seems silly. And I don’t think there was a time ever when I thought of myself as sexy. That has to do with looking like a kid, acting like an adolescent boy and tripping over my own two feet.
I also think beauty is in the eye of the beholder. Thank goodness that it seems the whole of London has the same damn pair of eyes since men send alcohol to her table at restaurants. Sam, can I call you Sam? Good. Sam, even with my average looks, when I used to go out, there were times when someone sent me a drink. Big freakin deal. Just a few short years ago I had a cute whipper snapper, eight years younger than moi, canoodle with me for a few months. But do I chalk that up to I must be just oh my goodness, sooooo beautiful!
And about that Hollywood thing. Sweetie, you do realize that is the land of make believe, right? Charlie Sheen went off the deep end last year and ran around LA shouting WINNING and drinking Tiger Blood. D-Listed reguarly features some woman they call Chicken Cutlets (aka Pheobie Price) and she claims to be some super dooper model. Hell, there are still a few paps around that will take Paris Hilton’s picture. So I wouldn’t be bragging about how comfortable people are with your beauty. People are paid in LA to tell someone just how wonderful they are, how the world would end without them and they say yes to every request or thought. Why? Because it’s a paycheck baby! And let’s not forget that it is also the land of the crazies, drug addicted, alcohol addicted, sex addicted, let’s go to rehab type of place.
No my dear Sam, people aren’t jealous of you. More than likely your winnning personality sets their teeth on edge and they are glaring at you because you are just that obnoxious. It is fine to have self esteem but you my sweet little flower, are no super model. Nor are you someone that I would immediately think, gee! I wish I looked like her!
Oh and a little tip for you. One of the pictures in your article shows a noticible pooch; get some Spanx and that should smooth it out. Just saying, from one normal looking girl to someone who is just so “beautiful.”