The One Where I Get Cooties


Ever since I could remember, I have been allergic to most everything. Dirt, grass, cats, makeup, you name it and I had some kind of reaction to it. I would get that look from my mom after playing outside, snot running down my face and saying I had not been playing in the dirt. Besides the dirt under my nails, I think the snot running down my face pretty much gave it away.

I have grown out of some of my allergies and others like to hang in there just for the fun of it. Several years ago I had many small bites on the tops of my feet. I thought they were bug bites or chiggers but after a week they spread all the way up my body. Several months later I finally learned that it was poison ivy and it took forever to get rid of, since then I am usually cautious about my interactions with the outdoors.

A month or so ago I noticed that I kept breaking out at my hairline, small clusters of bumps that itched. I kept thinking it was all the sweating from working out clogging my pours. I tried my old standby from Clinique to rid myself of the acne. It wouldn’t go away. So then I tried Benedryl Gel for Kids (don’t get the one for adults, it does nothing!) thinking that would clear it up. Still nothing.

Then it decided to spread around my scalp, behind my ears and at the nape of my neck. And I was itchy! And when my glasses would hit the section behind my ears that would hurt. After finally admitting that nothing was helping and quite frankly I was over the itchy thing weeks ago I went to see my doctor. Bless her, it seems like I am always in there for random things instead of the normal things.

A foam and a strong antihistamine later, I am less itchy but this stuff has yet to disappear. Although it really helps the naps happen more often and longer. That stuff always makes me sleepy.

Bird is convinced I have cooties. And I have to laugh because this was the biggest insult one to give to you in grade school. My cooties are apparently caused by some allergen in the air mixed with the massive amounts of sweat. I also have a nice patch on my wrist. I will say this though, this is much better than the excema I dealt with a few years ago. This is somewhat hidden. Then? I looked like a poster child for when bad skin happens to good people.

I could go the route of seeing an allergist and getting the skin testing done but really, I just don’t see the point. I know my skin is sensitive and has many issues. I would prefer not to have to add more medications to my routine, more lotions or potions and then still have to worry about getting into something that might break me out.

Instead I will look for a bubble that I can crawl into and go about life that way. Sure, it will be hard to get into my car and drive, snuggling with the cat will be difficult and of course, should something shocking happen I go on a date? How embarrassing would that be for a first date? So sorry Joe! I really am not this robust but this bubble really helps with the cooties!

On second thought, I am thinking the cooties would scare the guy off as well! Another reason to put on the list of why I am still single! And I doubt my trainer would be forgiving if I said I couldn’t do a particular exercise due to the bubble. He’s kind of sneaky that way, if you say something is easy or you don’t particularly like something, he makes you do it ten fold! And I pay for this? Oy Vey! The things I will do to get healthy!

Oh and just for a little “go me” I have to brag. My madras dress that I got a billion years ago at Target and wore out on the infamous 21st birthday outing for my friend’s sister? Where I looked completely out of sync with the hipster kids? I can get that bad boy down over my hips again! I still need to lose quite a bit more before I wear it as a dress again (instead of as a long shirt) but dude! I can get it over my hips!

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