The one were I fight with anxiety


Seven years ago I inherited panic attacks from my father and his father…a quick trip to the ER with Stace where the beeps that kept sending my anxiety go up a few notches.

But after what felt like months, my meds kicked in and I learned how to cope. To learn how to rely on people was the toughest part, life went on and for fun I moved a couple of times because well…that is what I do.

Work became a bit much for me, the stress, the worry, the desire to move, make changes ended up being the catalyst to cycle panic attacks. Which is scary and by the time I met up with my wonderful doctor, I knew I have fallen into a rabbit hole. We knew that this could always happen but our last conversation was about how thrilled I was to be off all the meds.

Doctors orders–back on the meds and I had to do Xanax 3 times a day. I didn’t want to but I also know that the quicker I jump onto this mess and got some control the better my life would be…

While I would love to be med free, My mental health, the anxiety that can grip me to the point where I don’t want to try anything overrules those desires to be drug free. I will take the meds and strive to be the very best I can be.

I also know that for me, I want to be happy but I will not settle and if being alone makes me happy, than I am okay with that. Good family and friends is all I need….oh and my most favorite neurotic little man Wook.

I can see the light, the goodness and that I will be alright. And really, that’s the best answer to any question,

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Author:

What you see is what you get; I am a Nashville girl who is single, again. I use the blog to get my inner, tortured, wanna be writer angst out. One day I just may write a book. I have been stumbling through life for 43 years now, I love to cook, read and figure out more embarrassing ways I can either harm myself (thank you hula hoop of 2010 and the case of the thrown back) or just prove how inept I am at household chores and dieting. The people you read about on here are real but most have had their names changed to protect the innocent and not so innocent. And I really should make a list of them so I can remember! Enjoy, read, mock, laugh and comment, it really isn't difficult. Plus, I would prefer reading comments from real people as opposed to the weird spam comments I keep getting. Plus, I will always find the hardest path to follow and take that one, why would anyone want to take the easy way?!

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