Tuesday Randomness

After some interesting games this past weekend I figured I would be in the clear for an uneventful week. But like with most things in my life, something odd always pops up.

  • After running a few errands Saturday, I came home and camped out on the couch for football. . .it was a sad day, Texas and Georgia lost
  • I kept staring at the tree, trying to pluck up the energy to get the rest of the ornaments on
  • And then I rubbed my eye. . .
  • It was sore, really sore. I went to the bathroom, removed my makeup and inspected my eye.
  • Nothing was amiss, no bloodshot eyes, no eye boogies, anything; the soreness could best be explained as it felt like a bruise
  • I tried to keep my hands off of my eye and got ready for bed
  • I woke up the next morning, the corner of my eye was still really sore but the pain jutted up the nose and around to the start of my eyebrow. . .HUH?
  • There was some bruising but again, the eye itself was fine. I popped some ibuprofen, got ready and headed out to pick up Stace for the football game
  • All I can say about the Titans/Texans game is, well the seats were awesome and the weather was perfect but the consistency of the Titans was lacking
  • Towards the end of the game the pain had gone down and around my cheek. This is all on the right side of my face.
  • After a restless night of trying to keep enough ibuprofen in me, I broke down and called my doctor
  • This pain just isn’t normal, I have had a million sinus infections but this was nothing like those in the past
  • A visit to my doctor, where I stumped her, they threw out possibilities of very few options, none of which sounded appealing, starting with a CT Scan
  • Finally I walked out with a round of antibiotics with a promise to monitor the pain and let them know what was going on Wednesday
  • Two days of antibiotics down and I feel much better, I am still tender, the swelling has gone down and the bruising is not noticible
  • I am beginning to think I need to become a science experiement
  • Dad added another item to his Christmas list. . . I believe I know where I get this from
  • I am finally below 180lbs. . . I now weigh 179
  • I still have a lot of work to do but I am losing it and that helps me feel better
  • I have to make peanut butter chocolate balls for Bird, these might be the death of me
  • I am also making a birthday cake for my BFF, I can’t wait to see how I do with the frosting–it has been awhile
  • I am watching all kinds of Christmas movies in between football, I am also getting a bit sad that football is winding down
  • The sad panda face might be coming out soon

And I am begging Mother Nature to please, please get the weather under control. It needs to be much cooler than it is. . . I don’t want to wear shorts and flip flops now. So bring on the snow!

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Tuesday Randomness

Welcome to blackberry winter! While I do love me some cold weather, I would prefer for things to stay about the same. . .trying to figure out what to wear to work each day is tough! But it is Tuesday and that means just a few more days until the weekend!

  • How to make sure your Monday starts off with a bang? Have a panic attack in the middle of the night! It has been quite some time since I had a middle of the night panic attack, good times.
  • Par for the course, I haven’t a clue what triggered the silly thing.
  • I managed to talk myself down from the panic without the use of my safety meds or running to the ER. I have made strides since that first major one in 2007.
  • I also got to enjoy a nice headache courtesy of the pollen yesterday afternoon, a dose of Advil and I was headache free by the time I hit the gym.
  • My trainer is still trying to work on my coordination skills, I have to make sure he understands that my clumsiness actually works for blog fodder.
  • I did step on the scale yesterday morning, more out of curiosity than anything else. . .no change in weight but. . .
  • I did manage to get into one of my favorite pairs of khakis today that are a size 12! I may not be losing a ton of weight right now but my fat is turning into a solid mass of muscle.
  • If you are in the market for a 5’1″ bodyguard, I am your girl!
  • I should not watch Love It or List It on HGTV, besides the fact that the realtor can’t pick houses to save his life that are actually a good match with the family, the lady that offers of renovations hasn’t a clue what it takes for an actual reno. There are always surprises and over the top promises that cannot be delivered.
  • My BFF Stace and her hubby have been talking about adding on for years and with all of this HGTV watching I am itching to rip some walls down and some floors up!
  • I am really good with a hammer and a reciprocating saw!
  • After eating breakfast with Sonia and family the other weekend I cannot get enough eggs. This always happens when I visit with her and have breakfast.
  • The best part? Son reminding me to make sure the scrambled eggs are well done. Apparently no longer living nearby makes her forget that I used to cook them to her specs for ages.
  • She still loves my spaghetti prepared via the microwave. This was a college staple for us and apparently I was really good at getting enough salt in the water.
  • I no longer cook it in the microwave, it pays to have an apartment with a kitchen!
  • My delusions of dancing with Maks on Dancing with the Stars is back and in full force. This means it must be time for me to try Zumba again so I can remind myself that I am not that person!

I guess I need to get ready for bed so I can snuggle up to the Wook and watch some tv. I am a bit tired and today seemed to drag on forever. And I have a training session tomorrow evening which means there will be more crying from me. It hurts but I have to say it is worth it. And I just might get to earn some extra money as a bodyguard in the future.

Tuesday Randomness

Well, well, well, hello Tuesday and can I say thank you for allowing me not to be in too much, over the top pain this morning? Let me do a little Snoopy dance for everyone while I work out the stiff muscles.

  • It seems my life now revolves around aches and pains, and I fully blame my trainer for this. . .
  • I was talking to my twin today when I asked her if she would carry me around when I am up in Nashville a few weeks from now, she said the chances of destroying businesses and falling would increase dramatically.
  • I asked her if there was a special event insurance coverage we could take out for the day, sadly I really think there is such a thing
  • The Queen is sick, as in, she is actually at home resting, not running around like a crazy person
  • This almost never happens, she is more like a watch that takes a beating and keeps on ticking
  • I had her in stitches last night discussing my hurt tush as well as the normal pain from working out, she laughed while begging me to stop. She then promptly coughed up a lung.
  • She also paid me one of the best compliments in the world, apparently Kristen Bell is on a Showtime show and her character reminds the Queen of ME!
  • I didn’t pay her to say that either. . .
  • I had to fess up that my toes are looking kind of sad and she begged me to not send her a picture. . . yes I have sent many a nasty looking foot picture in the past.
  • I got to love on a brand new baby this evening, my sweet neighbor finally had her little boy! He is a cutie and man, his sisters are all about him. . .
  • I seemed to have gained a couple of pounds back but I am hoping that is the muscles being built up and the fat going away
  • Wookie has taken being the baby to new levels, this morning he sat by the bed waiting for me to pick him up and put him on there before I left for work
  • This could be why I don’t have kids, if I can let a little grey monster dictate my life I don’t need munchkins!
  • Mom has her Darth Vadar machine now, otherwise known as a CPAP. Apparently the cat that I still maintain doesn’t really exist checks on her throughout the night.
  • A few weeks ago I picked up some Cornish Game Hens for dad, since then he has harassed me about them. I finally got them to their house, along with a ton of peanut butter and coffee.
  • Tomorrow is another personal training day, oh dear, I hope I can make it through it!
  • Although I am loving the whole, “Rest the next day,” instructions, yes sir! I will not work out!

And now I must get ready and hit the hay. I guess working out hard has helped with the whole sleeping thing. And I have to start drinking a lot more water because I have been slacking.

The One Where I Fall on My Tush

Why yes, if there is a way to harm myself, I seem to find it. This time, thankfully, it was a graceful fall, per my trainer who I am still convinced is quite evil. The gym was packed today and we kept to one area while doing a portion of my session.

I was doing what I guess you would call some type of squat. I start by laying on the mat, do a crunch, grab the bar and stand up. The whole point of this exercise is to strengthen my tummy and legs. I get through two of them and my trainer is saying, good job, great form! Yeah! I am doing something right!

Unfortunately number three was when the bar popped up and I landed firmly on my tush. He did compliment me saying that had I not yelped in shock it would have looked like I hadn’t fallen. I may have an ample tush but that little fall hurt.

I am really liking the whole hiring a trainer although it takes days for me to feel normal again. My walk looks all kinds of wonky and no matter how hard I try, I tend to flop onto the toilet seat because my legs are killing me.

Oh and I smell like an old man. For those that know me, I have a serious soft spot for little old men. I think they are adorable. But let’s just say that the scent of Icy Hot is not one of my favorite things to smell. I got desperate last Thursday evening after hurting so bad that even ibuprofen wasn’t helping and picked up a bottle of that stuff. It doesn’t mesh well with Amazing Grace by Philosophy. Just saying.

The rest of the workout went smoothly until I told him I was thinking not so nice things about him. Thank goodness this kid has a sense of humor. After the torture of the treadmill (with an incline of 13, seriously, that is just wrong) he had me hit the elliptical for seven minutes. He even got on the one next to me and we watched Tim Tebow say he was excited about playing for the Jets 45 times. I asked him if he thought Tebow was excited and then figured it might have been his word for the day.

Now I am off to basically bathe in the Icy Hot and pray that I can walk tomorrow. Or be able to lift Wookie to the bed without dropping him tonight. All I can say is, I can’t wait to start seeing some results because this has to be one of the most sadistic ways I have spent money, ever.

Tuesday Randomness

If you heard crying last night, it was probably coming from my direction. Funny how gaining weight isn’t painful but losing it is beyond painful. Another Tuesday and while I am wishing for a massage and someone to carry my stuff everywhere, I will work through the pain of typing because it is time for more randomness. . .

  • First personal training session done and let’s just say that while my trainer said I did a good job I feel like I failed all my tests yesterday.
  • I remember the Presidential Fitness test thing we had to do in school, I remember barely getting the minimum number of pull ups to past that portion. . .my upper body strength never improved since then. Let’s just say that by number 36 of my pushups I went face first into the mat. He gave me number 37.
  • I hate pushups, pullups and the rope climbing drill.
  • I may have a food baby (that is getting smaller by the week, THANK GOODNESS!) but I can do crunches all day long, do not ask my why I can manage that. . .
  • The air conditioner was not working at the Y yesterday which made for a really interesting workout
  • Have I ever mentioned how my face turns beet red when I do any type of physical activity? I was rocking the super red face with pink shirt yesterday. . .
  • Need to stick with grey shirts, pink and red do not work well together
  • Some girls may glisten but I all out sweat, pouring buckets, it really is a great look on me
  • I finished rereading The Hunger Games and now I am onto the second book, can’t wait to see the movie
  • Thanks to my mommy, I got an Amazon gift card last week. I love getting Amazon boxes on my doorstep. And it is all thanks to still believing in Santa Claus, the Easter Bunny, the Leprechaun and even the Daylight Savings Time Fairy! Dude, I will keep on believing just so I can get those little surprises, I have no shame.
  • My arms still feel like jello, I am hoping to have some stabilization by the weekend, who cares if I collapse on my face several times tomorrow during my next session?
  • I passed out last night at ten, woke up at some point really early this morning with a grey furball sprawled over me. I just rolled over and went back to sleep.
  • Speaking of the Wookster, I washed my sheets and comforter this past weekend. I am now the proud owner of ten fur kittens. He is a short haired, how is this possible?
  • Last week he was treated to deck time while I brushed him, I think I managed to get at least five fur kittens then.
  • After having Pollo Caprese at Macaroni Grill last week I made my own version of it Sunday. Let’s just say I rocked it out.
  • I was laughing with my twin today about the Great Surgery of 2009. Poor thing had to listen to me yap about food the whole time she was around. To be fair, I was going on day two of no food and dog food would have sounded good.
  • And yes, when I was little I told my mom I was so hungry that I would eat dog food. I did, well, I spit it out as quickly as I bit into it. I will never live that down.
  • I have this issue with the trucks that carry all the live chickens crammed on it. Chandler had the same issue. Last week I was rolling down the interstate, kept seeing white things float by and then realized it was a chicken truck producing the white things (um, feathers). I started laughing, looked up through my sunroof and said, “Thanks Chandler!!!”
  • And that is why I only by the organic, free range chicken now, it makes me sad to see the chicken truck.

Well, tomorrow is another training day for me, let’s hope I can raise my arms when my trainer is done with me. And if you happen to see a very red faced blonde, don’t panic, that part is normal. Just open the doors for her and offer to carry her crap to the car.

Welcome

Sorry for the long web address, I couldn’t find one that I liked that wasn’t being used!

So. . .once again I find myself single and while for some that is a great and exciting time, well let’s just put it this way, I am kind of at a loss. The boy was a great match, voila eHarmony, but a few minor things that were shared online and then proven to be not so true popped up during our 14 month relationship. I am proud of the whole thing though because I spoke up for myself.

The boy was a great guy who ultimately didn’t want to get married. It might have been he didn’t want to marry me but I am going to at least try and convince myself that it was all him, a guy who happened to not want to get married.

I have always wanted to get married but I do pick the wrong guys. I have friends that have been proposed to several times and I feel like the statement by Bridget Jones in the movie, (paraphrasing here) that us single girls in our thirties have scales underneath our clothes. And that my friend is why I am still single.

I also want to have children and I am sure if I go on any dates in the future, the guy will run for cover as soon as he realizes I am 35, never been married but want to get married and have kids. No pressure there, right?

I have issues, which I am sure each of you will pick out quickly as time goes by but hey, we all have them and I like to think of them as quirks. . .

Do I miss the boy? Most definitely and I still think about him daily and the love I have for him will always be there. Was it easy for me to walk away from him? No. In fact, the decision was beyond heartbreaking and I have regretted it since day one but he said he wants to move forward. I can’t blame him but man, this is so hard and I can’t help but think back to that evening and wishing I could change a few things.

It has been almost a month since I walked and my life has been quite challenging. Hope you don’t mind the girl talk for a bit. . .

I had an abnormal pap smear in 1998, which resulted in a biopsy and a LEEP procedure for dysplasia. I had normal paps since then until May of this year. I had a biopsy again, this time, it hurt more than I remembered the last one. After a week of pure hell, waiting and crying, my biopsy was clear but I would need to be checked again in October.

I will say this, for any woman that hates this annual procedure, get it done anyway, it is a life saving test. I have no issues spreading my legs for my doctor because I have been through this twice and prefer to know as soon as possible so I can get the medical care needed.

During my regular visit we also discussed that time of the month becoming more like those when I was younger and not on the pill. This was the third year that I complained about it and I think that my doctor finally decided to send me in for an ultrasound just to shut me up!

I learned that I had a fibroid (8cm big), a cervix that does not want to be found and a uterus that tilts backwards. Hey, I don’t ever do anything the easy way.

The nurse was like, no big deal, etc but knowing that I had that fibroid and linking it with my symptoms made it clear that something needed to be done.

My doctor will not touch it because of where it is located (umm, naturally, the thing can’t be nice) and I have been sent to a specialist. Actually, to a fertility clinic. Nice huh?

So off I will go this week to see what my options are and my parents aren’t thrilled with the whole thing. Mom keeps telling me it will just go away and Dad just thinks I am hell bent on surgery. I would offer up a month in my shoes for both of them but I don’t think they would get my concerns.

All of this is to say that once I had the answer to the biopsy, a date with the fertility doc the ramifications of walking away from the boy hit harder due to the fact that I was focusing on other things.

Will it get easier? At some point yes but for the moment, I am stumbling through it like I do most things.

The only upside is I have lost ten pounds and have about 40 more to go to get to my ideal weight. I have been forcing myself to eat and started the 30 Day Shred by Jillian Michaels. That hurts like no other but I am going to keep doing it because it makes me not think about the fact that the boy is no longer in my life.